Smart ass…indeed !

Toronto, Ontario….1981. It seems that a lot of stuff happened to me during this time in my life. I think it was more that I was more observant to what was going on around me, rather than just what was going on itself.

I mean, while walking to see Gordon Lightfoot at Massey Hall with my Uncle Mike (Uncle Mike’s Christmas Punch)….that Uncle Mike….we were passed on Yonge Street by a young girl in her early twenties or late teens on roller skates. Nothing new there….except she had on a green bikini….and it was about -10c and snowing. Other than that….nothing out of the ordinary. She was apparently advertising for a new strip club….but, didn’t stay still long enough for us to read her belly and chest….that’s where the ad was printed. Also, since she was circling the block in the same direction as us, all we saw was her ass.

I saw street hawkers selling everything from caricature art to pencils for the hari krishnas. It was a different place…and time. A lot of what I saw that defied explanation was on the subway. We heard some great music by buskers in the stations, better than a lot of clubs we went to actually. We saw street artists and dancers…amazing stuff….and confusing.

But, I digress. I actually met a smart ass on the subway one day, who had a smart ass! He was actually able to read the newspaper with it. I was on the subway heading to work when I encountered one fellow in my car who was sitting on that days edition of The Toronto Sun. Since he was just sitting on it….I asked if he was reading it. He said “Yes…asshole….I am”..they were always so polite down in Toronto. At which point he stood up, turned the page on the paper and sat down.

I figured this smart ass really must have a smart ass if he could read the paper through his rectum. What a place!



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