When people ask me “when you write, where do you get ideas”
I say sometimes they arrive at night, and other times from beers
I put words in an order that people seem to like
To me it is real easy, like riding on a bike
You can do it too I say, the words are all the same
Just write about the things you like, and make it like a game
Take things that go on naturally and give a little twist
Some will like what you just wrote and others will be pissed
Now, take it one step further and give this one a try
Try to keep them twisted, but try to make them cry
Now some words fit together and they go together well
While others change in meaning, they shoot your writing all to hell
Certain words just do not work and to them I give a pass
It never made much sense to me when one says “plastic glass”
Jumbo shrimp is another phrase that I find quite confusing
But to George Carlin, these two words were really quite amusing
One word right now I’d like to use, and I don’t want to be a hero
Is the one you know, that means nothing and that word now is ZERO
A zero is what’s left when you take all things away
It can also be a person, like an actor in a play
It isn’t easy to write this word alone and make it fun
And even when you pair it up, your work just isn’t done
It changes things, negates, subtracts it’s not an easy word
And in fact outside of math class, it’s very rarely heard.
It doesn’t come off positive and it doesn’t make one laugh
To even use it properly, your work you have to craft
Other words and phrases can complicate things too,
For instead of just one meaning, there’s some that might have two!
Balls is one example of a word that goes both ways
And if you look down deep enough, there’s humour in that phrase
I try to pair words up in ways I hope will not offend
I try to take some topics, twist them up and then I blend
Them all together to make it something new
Of all the poems I seem to write you may only see a few.
Now, back to words that don’t make sense, and this to you I’ll show,
The next word will be tolerate, you know…accepting, letting go,
Tolerance is something most accept, you know just let things slide
But pair it up with other words and the doors just open wide
Just pair it up with zero and it means that’s not allowed
Not now, and no not ever, not alone or in a crowd
But funny, how this phrase gets used and used and used again
It’s like saying “Now…I’ve told you once…and I’ll tell you yet again”
To me it means “your’e finished, you’ve broken all our trust”
“you’ve taken our damn rule book, and you’ve made it into dust”
To me it means final, the end, no more, you’ve ended up like Nero
I need to know, how many times there are that add to Zero!
Now, many words can hurt and sting and just aren’t nice at all
These, I avoid and in a pinch, I work on back to “ball”
I’m glad that you have taken time to read my poems and verses
It’s because of you that I stay sane, and stay away from Nurses
and Doctors who say, you’re just mad, your mind it isn’t right
So, I listen to their words, twist them up and say good night
Now, do yourself a favour, try and write something that’s fun
You can show it off to others or you can be the only one,
That reads what you have written, you know it really could be good
But, you’ll never know exactly…till you show it like you should.

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